Print this article E-mail this article More articles by this author

On behalf of everyone watching this show last night, I wholeheartedly empathize. While I may be battling the onset of a flu, at least with the Fall season this is something I could predict. I could not however predict the level to which I'd be painfully forcing myself awake during this week's task. I believe in some part this is due to the choice of this week's task revolving around QVC. Personally, I fall into a deep coma every time I flip past that channel while surfing the TV. Why on earth would I want to watch an entire episode of The Apprentice devoted to the snooze fest? Apart from making poor choices in financial backers (such as QVC), Trump has been illustrating some downright horrible choices in the boardroom. This unacceptable behavior coupled with my achy symptoms (attributable to said flu) have made me cranky and irritable. As such, I can't be held accountable for my inability to assess the content in this week's show. (No more so than Pamela's apparent inability to assess her peers.)

Giving Chics a Bad Name: Apex

At the risk of getting back up on the feminist soapbox my body was permanently wedged in last season, I won’t go too in depth here, but sufficed to say, I think more offensive than the women’s team from Season 1 repeatedly using sex to sell is this year’s womens’ team catty antics and need to blame their leader at all costs, even to the extent that they’d rather waste time placing accountability than actually devote the required time and effort into winning their tasks. Case in point: Ivana, on every episode, has something negative to say about the leader from the start. Before the Project Manager even opens their mouth, she’s ready to place blame. And her biggest concern about Pamela’s leadership is that she “doesn’t hold herself accountable for anything.” Dude, take a look at yourself before casting lots. Personally anytime Ivana opens her mouth, I cringe and I can honestly say I’ve never seen a bunch of more unsavory, self-righteous people: Stacy R., with her whiny platitudes (literally elicits a physical symptom of stomach turning from me); Elizabeth, the young Meg Ryan lookalike (my initial favorite) is so spineless and ready to place blame on anyone just to save her sorry little soul. Sandy is non-descript, but also shallow and spineless. Jennifer M. just strikes me as evil, but at least capable. I think she’ll probably make it to the end. Similar to the first Apprentice ’s Amy, she has the shiny veneer and seemingly cut throat interior. Maria is as good as gone. She’s had way too much boardroom time to be spared a firing, but in her defense it’s a shame. I think she also gets the raw end of the scapegoat theatrics, but then again she’s also a catty femme fatale so not shedding too many tears.

The Project at Hand

This week’s mission has the teams selling products on QVC. As the teams are now 8 (Mosaic) to 6 (Apex), Trump decides that Apex could benefit from Pamela’s Harvard/Wharton background. Apparently Trump is a poor assessor of people or he never would have deemed Pamela capable. Not to say she isn’t, but in the past few weeks we’ve been shown no stand-out evidence of such. I do have to say that with Pamela does manage to execute orders to these gals and watching her boss them around kinda did something for me. Did it turn me on? No, but it made me think: See women are capable of getting the job done. She made me a believer. Good thing Trump, his trusty henchwoman, Carolyn, and the rest of the female candidates were around to disprove this theory. And you ask me why I’m cynical?

Move over Mr. Clean

The gals decide on a cleaning product (to sell) and price it at $27. Jennifer M. feels like the 30 sponge set shouldn’t be more than $19.99. After all, who wants to pay nearly a $1 for a sponge. Yes, this is where all the graduate degrees in the world don’t always allow for common sense. What were you thinking Pamela? Or better yet, what was Maria thinking when the camera was finally turned on to her at the rehearsal. She turned into some kind of Stepford wife , all shiny and scarily energetic with frequent eye spasming. Pamela makes the decision to cast her aside and have Jennifer M. do the talking in the 12 minute infomercial. Good thinking. By the way, it is just as scary for you to watch Pamela and Stacy R. in one camera frame as it is for me? Talk about polar opposites. It's like land of the munchkins meets the BFG. (thanks Roald Dahl)

Price it Right, Gosh Darn it!

At Mosaic , there is some tension between Raj and Kelly. Raj feels that Kelly is taking over and becoming “de facto leader” leaving Chris’ role as Project Manager nearly obsolete. But then again, Chris doesn’t strike me as the executive type. Secretly, I think he likes being bossed around and Kelly has dominated this team from the get-go. In the end it all works out with Chris opting for Kelly’s higher pricing of the wok, and Raj brooding and venting about how to propely manage a group. Unfortunately for Raj, no one is listening, nor do they care.

Another week, another win for the guys. Yes, it’s getting old already. This isn’t a competition, it’s a massacre. The guys win by $10 and Team Apex looks devastated or too busy thinking: Who should we blame next? The answer is simple really, Pamela! She is the leader after all. Elizabeth is quick to point this out to the others later that day. Yeah sure, Elizabeth, I mean we wouldn’t want anyone to be privy to just how poor of a leader you turned out to be a few weeks back and how you felt when your head was on the chopping block. No one liked you much then. And I can’t stand you now.

Gratuitous Fun, the Kind we all Like

As a prize for winning this week’s project, the guys get to hit balls with Tennis greats John McEnroe and Anna Kournikova. There is some flirting between Raj and Anna. Well, Raj flirting with Anna and hoping to secure a date with the “epic beauty.” I haven’t been around the block too much, but enough to know that a woman who is dating Enrique Iglesias isn’t gonna stoop to Raj. There are levels of hotness that just don’t match up. Predictably, Raj loses the bet and as a result has to run around the stadium sans culottes. (stripped down to his boxers) What I found really humiliating was how McEnroe (pissy at not having the attention on him) decided to use Raj as a live target and pelt balls at him. Ouch. That’s gotta hurt. And we’re no talking simply Anna’s rejection.

In the boardroom, Pamela decides to take Stacy R and Maria down with her. According to Pamela, Stacy R, in her role as anal lawyer impeded the progress of the team and served to “devalue” the team. Maria was just bad on camera and misrepresented her abilities to sell. Trump attacks Pamela for not assessing these women’s strengths properly, but how could she? She was on the team for like half a second. Trump’s retort: A good leader knows how to read people. P-L-E-A-S-E! It’s no shocker he’s grabbing for straws here. After Bradford’s dismissal I was slightly peeved, and now with Pamela, I think Trump is a veritable moron. You done bad, Donald, very bad. Only time will tell if this season can be saved, but personally I think it’s a wash. With little inspiration to write reviews, and no fire in my belly, I’m questioning how many others out there are experiencing the same sentiments. Maybe I’m just annoyed that I missed ABC’s new, Life as We Know it . Go ABC. You done good this season, very good.