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by Scott Wyatt Published: February 19, 2005
We open with Jeff cruising through the beauty of Palau in a very expensive-looking boat. He informs us of some of the beauty and violent history of Palau. This is where some of the most intense air and sea battles took place in WWII. There is wreckage scattered everywhere and it haunts these waters as a reminder of man’s explosive past and nature’s ability to reclaim it. For the first time ever, there are 20 Survivors set adrift with only the clothes on their backs and one canteen of water each. Everything they have to come to expect about the beginning of this game will be wiped out in a few minutes. 39 days, 20 people, 1 Survivor. I love this phrase. We join our merry band of chucklenuts as they are rowing to nowhere. Jeff pulls up in this bathtub toy and tells them to head for the island directly behind them. When they get there, the first man and first woman will receive immunity necklaces. There are also two machetes and a map to water. At this point, they are a little more than a mile away from the beach but as of now, they are each on their own. They can row or they can swim or a combination of both but good luck and Jeff speeds away. Of course, it does not take long for the paranoia and strategy to begin. Everyone shuffles around the boat while Wanda the Songbird breaks out into singing and will not shut up. I would have thrown her ass into the water and not looked back. Wanda says this is one big party for her as long as it lasts. Maybe she shouldn’t have smoked the funny plant before getting on that boat. When the boat is about a half mile out, Stephenie and John decide to jump in and try to outswim the boat. Needless to say, it only takes about 10 seconds for the boat to leave them for the sharks. As they get closer to the shore, everyone is on edge until Jeff finally jumps and it’s a free-for-all as everyone hits the water. Ian easily beats everyone to shore as Jolanda just barely edges Jennifer to claim the other immunity necklace. After the customary hellos and realizing that John and Steph are still out in the water, the paranoia kicks into gear. Several folks are immediately thrown off their game with the new start to the game. Hmmm, me likes this so far. Once everyone is ashore, the tasks of building shelter and finding the water source begins in earnest. With four people gone for the water, everyone else takes to building the shelter while Wanda continues to kill everyone’s eardrums with her screeching agony of song. James give it a valiant shot at the fire but fails. Meanwhile, the wardrobe department has found its way to the forefront with everyone modifying their clothing for a more comfortable look, which is fine with Ian. Shirts are being tied up, skirts are getting higher and bras are now bikini tops. I’ll bet the unedited footage is a sight to see. The search party for the water finds the source and a bag of everyone’s athletic shoes. On the way back, Coby and Angie pair up as the first alliance because they are the freaks. At the shelter building, Janu proves she is as much a cat as she is a showgirl as she climbs a tree to work on the roof of the shelter. While Janu is up the tree, Tom and Stephenie begin deal making but realize that everything could be reshuffled tomorrow. Elsewhere, Coby is now working on Greg and Caryn and planting seeds of doubt about John. Next, we see Coby slowly working on everyone to get rid of John. The next morning Jeff shows up and informs the group that Ian and Jolanda are guaranteed to stay in the game for at least the next ten minutes, which cannot be said for the rest of the group. We’re going to have a schoolyard game of pick ‘em into two tribes of 9 players each. That means two players will be eliminated immediately and will leave on this boat. The players are stunned! Ian will pick first since he was the first to the beach and he will pick a woman then Jolanda will pick a man. The last player picked in each group will do the next picks. Ian picks Katie. Jolanda takes Bobby Jon. Katie picks Tom. Bobby Jon picks Stephenie. Tom picks Janu. Stephenie picks Jeff. Janu picks Greg. Jeff picks Kim. Greg picks Jennifer. Kim picks James. Jennifer picks Coby. James picks Ashlee. Coby picks Caryn. Ashlee picks Ibrehem. Caryn picks Willard. Ibreham picks Angie. Jonathan and Wanda have been eliminated. John is absolutely crushed. Wanda does what she does and breaks into song as the boat departs and everyone else cries. Jeff hands out the buffs – blue is Ulong and brown is Koror. They are two tribes living on the same beach. Writers Aside: I’m not really sure how I feel about this turn of events. On one hand, it’s something new and caught everyone completely off-guard but this was really a bush league move. John and Wanda go through all of the rounds of interviews and get flown out and get to play the game for a whole 24 hours before being told to get lost. This had to be especially painful to John after his battle with cancer. I don’t feel so bad for Wanda because she only considered this a big party for as long as it lasted. On the other hand, they made it farther than yours truly and they at least get a nice long 38-day paid vacation for their troubles. In the end, it’s Mark Burnett’s game and he’ll do what he wants with it. The two tribes return to their beach home and the realignment is in full swing. The paranoia reaches a new level as they two tribes try to figure out how they are going to live on the same beach and not let the others try to divide and conquer those within their own tribe. This could be really fun to watch if it stays this way. Angie is wallowing in her sorrows about being picked last and is furious with Coby for not picking her. Ibrehem believes that their youth and strength will carry them to victory which means they are toast. It’s time for the challenge. What, no tree mail? The challenge is for both reward and immunity in a jungle-obstacle course. First is a net maze and then a set of tires. Next you will reach a supply dump that contains a set of paddles that you must take and set of supplies that includes fire-making supplies, water cans, rice and flour and a tarp for shelter. The boxes have been weighted to make them heavy to carry. You can choose to take only one item or all of them but you must carry them through the rest of the course. Next, you have to go over a wall and through a jungle swamp. When you reach your team mat, drop your supplies and get into your canoe. Paddle out and retrieve your tribal flag and return to the beach. The first team to get back will win immunity and the supplies that they brought from the supply dump. Jeff tells Ian and Jolanda to lose the immunity necklaces and unveils the immunity idol, which is a cool-looking wooden carved monkey. Let’s play… From the start, Koror takes a lead with Tom at the front. Ulong actually passes Koror before the tire maze. At the supply dump, Koror unties all the knots and only take the fire supplies. Ulong, namely Jolanda, are arguing over what supplies to take and falls way behind. They finally make it to the wall just as Koror is finished. They make it through the swamp and are halfway to the flag before Ulong even makes it to the beach. From here, it is no contest. Koror is paddling with a sense of purpose while Ulong can’t figure out how to paddle. Koror easily wins the challenge before Ulong even makes it to their flag. Jeff awards the immunity and gives them a choice of returning to the same beach or a map to a new beach. For some stupid reason, they choose the new island where they will start from scratch and have to build another shelter. Jeff tells Ulong that they will get some much-needed paddling practice when they come to tribal council later that night. Everyone can head out. Writers Aside: Someone explain to me why in the world they would choose a new beach and have to start all over. This makes no sense. You have the other tribe already deflated by losing the challenge and can put them in a huge hole by sending them to a new island with no supplies. I think this will end up being a huge game decision that will haunt Koror throughout the game. Stupid! On the way to their new beach, Koror is ecstatic until they flip the outrigger. Katie says it was a wave but it must have been a small one with everyone leaning the wrong way. The worst part is their fire-making materials went straight to the bottom. Ian makes a couple of dives looking for it but comes up empty. Koror is deflated and in a worse position than before. Ulong arrives back at their beach completely dejected. At least they have shelter. Angie quickly surmises that her head is on the block because she was the last person picked for the tribe. Jolanda gets Ibrehem to side with her in voting out Angie because it’s all about strength to her. Stephenie tells Jolanda what she wants to hear but tells is that they lost because of Jolanda wanting to take everything. Bobby Jon tells Stephenie that he will not vote for Jolanda because of her strength. Jolanda then opens her mouth and instructs her tribe that every two hours they work that they will rest for one hour. Is everyone clear on that? Ashlee tells us that Jolanda is not a team player and has the wrong personality for this game. I agree. Next, we see Kim, James, Ashlee, Jeff and Angie agreeing to get rid of Jolanda. Angie is ecstatic at this turn of events as they head to tribal council. Writers Aside: When will they ever learn to keep their mouth shut? Jolanda standing up and basically ordering everyone to what they are going to do was tantamount to saying, “Please vote me out.” It will never cease to amaze me how stupid some of these players can be when they’ve been give the opportunity of their lives. Ulong arrives at tribal and Jeff gives them the fire is life speech and when it’s gone so are they from this game, which meant something until they pulled the BS Ghost Tribe crap back in the Pearl Islands. Jeff gets right to it with Stephenie who says its been tough with no fire and no water. James says the tribe is good while he plays up the redneck charade that I still say is an act. Jeff asks Jeff if their strategy to bring everything cost them the challenge. He replies that their decision-making cost them but not their strength. Jeff is amazed that they did not bring the fire and asks Ashlee if there is a leader in the Ulong tribe. She replies that is the only thing holding them back is that they have not come together. Jolanda says she would be glad to lead the team but doesn’t want to paint a large target on her head. Jeff then gets to Angie as being the last one picked. She said it was hard to be last but she thinks she tried hard which leave Jolanda trying not to laugh. It’s time to vote. Jolanda votes for Angie saying she’s too weak. Angie votes for Jolanda stating it her or Jolanda and it’s not going to be her. When the votes are read, by a 6-3 margin, Jolanda is the first person voted of Survivor Palau. Great Choice! Jeff tells the rest of the tribe that they better get it together and stop with the excuses or they will be back again very soon. He tells them to leave the fire and head back to camp. Next week, Koror gets infested with rats, questions their decision to take the new camp and they intensify their search for the sunken fire-materials. At Ulong, Jeff and Kim get cozy together. Some random thoughts – this was a great beginning and I hope they keep it going strong but one hour for a premiere is just not enough. There were several folks that only got a few seconds of camera time or maybe two words spoken. It’s just not enough time to get a feel for what these chucklenuts are really like and what may happen later on in the show. Do you hear this Mark Burnett? We want at least a 90-minute premiere! Ok, I’ll lighten up if you cast me on the next show. Be sure to check back next week for some more random musings. Until then, take care and God Bless. I hope everyone likes the pictures on the chart below. Props go out to the originator of this column, Jim Van Nest, for his help in putting it together. I will continue to find ways to bring him out of his self-imposed sabbatical.
For all your Survivor News, Links, Interesting Tidbits check out these sites: Sirlinksalot's Survivor: Palau Page | SurvivorNews.net | SurvivorUpdates.com |
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