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by Scott Wyatt Published: December 5, 2005
The game continues to wind down and the mental torture is taking its toll on the remaining chucklenuts. Will the Magic 4 Alliance hold or will they turn and eat one of their own? Can Danni win immunity and throw a huge wrench in the plans? Will Lydia ever do anything to show she deserves to be there? Will Steph ever shut up? Only one way to find out. Day 31 dawns at camp and no one seems remotely concerned about Gary’s boot the previous evening. In fact, they are so relaxed that the topic of conversation seems to be Steph’s gas. We all knew the sh*t she was spewing from the mouth but to have the smell confirmed by Judd of all people – Ewww! Lydia thinks she smells eggs and sausage. Don’t ask. Apparently, no one wants to talk about Judd getting called out for lying. Instead, they have a cartwheel contest and Judd would probably win the silver medal. Danni probably takes the gold but the most surprising thing is that her clothes don’t fall off when she goes upside down. Dammit! While we watch their tryout for the 2008 Olympic gymnastics team, Danni is narrating how dumb these folks are and how vulnerable Lydia seems to be around camp. REWARD CHALLENGE Wow! Less than three minutes into the show and it’s time for Jeff TV! The remaining six arrive and take a seat with excited looks on their faces. Tree mail indicated an auction that we saw in the previews but is nowhere to be found on the show. Jeff explains they will each have $500 American dollars to bid on various items. Money can be shared between two people only and only those two can share the item. The auction will end at any time. Judd and Steph are sniffing the money. I don’t think it was printed on the old mimeograph machine. First item is a small plate of beef jerky. Danni bids $20 while Steph and Judd turn up their nose. No one else is interested in it so Danni wins some much needed protein for a bargain $20. But wait, Jeff turns into Monty Hall and offers her the item under the covered tray. Danni wisely keeps her winnings as Jeff reveals a pot of uncooked corn. Item #2 is a three chocolate cookies and a glass of milk. Lydia starts it at $20 but Cindy bumps it to $40. It’s too rich for Lydia so Cindy takes it down for $40. As she brings it back to the bench, Danni gives us a very close second in the Quote of the Week. She looks over at Cindy and tells her “Ooh, those are nice cookies!” Is she looking at the cookies or Cindy’s chest? I’ll leave that to your imagination. Item #3 is not food. It is an individual mosquito net. Danni, Rafe and Lydia get into the act here with Lydia outbidding the tag team for a winning bid of $140. Huh? Wasn’t this the same lady who was bitching last week about not eating and she buys a mosquito net after she is already covered in bug bites? I can’t explain it. Item #4 comes out covered and will stay covered. The bidding quickly becomes a tag team event. Danni & Rafe vs Steph and Judd. It goes back and forth but Danni and Rafe edge out the self-professed leaders with $180 and discover they have won a gigantic Philly Steak Sandwich and fries. This thing is bigger than most of the small cars on the road today. Judd is really pissed at losing out on this one. Item #5 is a huge advantage at the next immunity challenge. You’d think that everyone would be after this item especially to keep Danni from getting it. The bidding comes down to Danni and Steph but when Danni ups it to $200, Steph can’t bring herself to stay in it. Danni gets the item for $200. This could be a real big swing in the game. Jeff explains to Danni that the envelope has a wax seal and it needs to remain this way until the immunity challenge. Item #6 is coming around the corner. It’s family members. Cue the tears. It’s Cindy’s twin sister, Mindy (aka Lindsay Lohan – she’s a dead ringer for the overrated child actress); Judd’s hot-looking wife, Kristin (how did Judd get her?); Rafe’s mother, Lonni; Danni’s brother, Drew; Lydia’s brother, Joseph (who she hasn’t seen in two years) and Steph’s boyfriend, Michael (wonder if he’s done steroids). The bid is for an overnight stay. Two people can share money but only one person gets to come back to camp so it could get real interesting if someone helps somebody else out. The bidding starts at $40 and quickly escalates to $300 from Rafe. Danni and Cindy are out of it because they lack the funds to stay in the race. When Judd and Steph go higher, Rafe is eliminated. It comes down to Cindy giving Judd her money and Steph “borrowing” Lydia’s money. In the end, Humpty Dumpty wins with $880 and Kristin is spending the night in camp. As usual, Jeff throws in a twist. Judd has also won the right to pick two people to have their loved ones come back to camp also but the drawback is the remaining three players will go back to the old Yaxha camp to spend the night with no supplies so Judd is going to make two people ecstatic and upset three others. Let the begging begin! Judd does the right thing by picking Cindy because of her financial help. Then he makes a really stupid move by picking Steph (again) to be the other one. Jeff sends the rest of the loved ones away no hugs – only tears and then sends Danni, Lydia and Rafe to the old Yaxha camp. This is where Judd lost his brains. He should have picked Lydia not only because she hadn’t seen her brother in two years but now he has put Danni with two people who will turn on his ass the first chance they get. Rafe doesn’t trust Judd and Lydia would vote for the crocs if she was told to. I hope this ego trip sends Judd away. When will these folks ever learn? Back at camp, Kristin, Michael and Lindsay Lohan, uh, I mean Mindy find out real quick that Survivor life sucks. Kristin is shocked that Judd has learned how to make fire. Mindy is ecstatic that her and Cindy get to play Wilderness Girls for real like they did when they were younger. Steph says she owes Judd big time for this and I wonder how she’ll pay him back. Judd tells his wife how everything is set up for him to run to the Final 2 and Kristin is already spending the million. Over at the Screw You tribe, Danni, Rafe and Lydia find the remains of the Yaxha camp and there are actually some items of use including the shelter. Rafe and Danni discuss strategy as Danni starts to plant seeds about a possible swing. Rafe concludes that he can’t trust Judd. Back at Camp Meatball, the love fest continues. Steph more or less tells Kristin that she and Judd are tight and they should be at the end together. Later, all of them are discussing the immunity challenge and Judd says it’s ok if Danni wins immunity. If she does then Lydia would be the next to go. Judd is getting full of himself again. This could be trouble. Day 32 dawns with everyone on a wood run. Mike is trying to break up some firewood by slamming a tree to the ground. If you listen hard enough, you can hear the tree, howler monkeys and film crew laughing at him. As breakfast is being cooked, the abandoned players return to find the loved ones still hanging around camp. A case of conversation breaks out again as Kristin gushes about Judd’s skills at camp. Judd says having his wife around has filled him up like 25 White Castle cheeseburgers. Where’s Harold and Kumar when you need them? After breakfast, the loved ones are walked to the dock for the tearful farewells. Once the family is gone, it’s back to daily camp life. Lydia suddenly develops a brain and tries to swing Judd by telling him that she will vote however he wants her to vote. He kind of shrugs her off as Danni sits down. Lydia continues to needle him and Judd says he knows who engineered the Jaime vote but if he says anything then he is screwed. The camera moves to Steph as he is saying this so it appears he feels it was Steph who did it. Wrong! That would be Rafe but this is Judd and Judd and brains don’t appear to be a compatible couple. All the while, Danni quietly sits there taking mental notes and plotting how she can use this to swing it her way. IMMUNITY CHALLENGE It’s time for Jeff TV once again! Jeff takes back the giant toad necklace from Rafe and it’s up for grabs. The challenge requires smarts, which causes Judd to grimace in pain. It’s a human chess game. Each player will move one square at a time flipping over the board to reveal a red side and moving to that board. Those squares are out and cannot be used again. You can move forward, backward or side-to-side. No diagonal moves are allowed. The top platform is a spinning one and at any time you can spin to another spot on the board. When you run out of boards to step onto – you’re out of the game. The last person left standing wins immunity. Let’s take a look at Danni’s clue. It says she can trade spots at any time with another player on the board. The game begins and it moves along slowly. Cindy gets the spinning platform but she spins to a location that only gets her to be the first one eliminated – by Lydia. Two moves later, Danni uses her switch reward to switch with Steph, who mumbles something under her breath and begrudgingly switches places. The next move eliminates Lydia. A few moves later, Rafe is eliminated. On Judd’s next move, he eliminates himself but thinks he has one move left. Jeff reminds him that he cannot move diagonally and Judd is gone. It’s down to Steph and Danni. Three moves later, Danni says it was money well spent as she eliminates Steph and wins immunity. YES! Who will go tonight? It won’t be Danni! Back at camp, the mood is down once again. Danni, on the other hand, is excited and clues us into a big possible surprise tonight at Tribal Council. While Danni and Steph work on the corn, Steph wants to know what Judd said the day before. Danni jumps all over this and rats out Judd for his feelings about the Jaime vote. Steph’s eves nearly pop out of brainless head at this revelation. She asks if it was just Judd and Lydia and Danni confirms that while continuing to make Steph think that Judd wants her, as a threat, gone from the game. None of this is lost on the whipping girl of the season. In a confessional, Steph tries to rationalize why Judd may turn on her. Later, Rafe is helping her with the corn and when she suggests voting out Judd, Rafe wisely chooses to think about it and consult with her later. Suddenly, the conversation has swung to the jungle where Steph, Rafe and Danni are working out a deal. They all want to see Judd go home but they can’t decide if they should bring Cindy into the deal . Steph continues that she promised Kristin that her and Judd were sticking together until the end so she is really conflicted. While these three are making their plans, Lydia is continuing her assault on Judd. She reiterates that her vote is for sale. Later, she makes the same offer to Rafe but Judd overhears her and calls her out in it. Judd narrates how the deal was broken down so Lydia should be the target tonight. He says he’ll miss her after tonight but it has to be done but as long as it isn’t him going home, he’ll be smiling. TRIBAL COUNCIL Jeff brings in the jury of Bobby Jon, Jaime and Gary and we get to the loved ones questions. He asks Steph about having Mike around camp. She says it was great to have him there blah blah blah. Jeff tells Danni that she is smiling because of the results of the immunity challenge. She says there was no way that she wasn’t going to get it in the auction. Jeff asks Cindy how difficult it is emotionally to vote someone out tonight. She answers you have to consider alliances and how they work into your plans while keeping in mind that they will be on the jury with a million bucks at stake. Jeff moves to Rafe and asks if he has considered the ramifications of what happens next when they are down to 5? He says that you don’t know whom to trust so it comes down to your gut feeling. Jeff goes back to Steph and asks the importance of how you vote someone out. She says it’s important enough that if you make it to the Final 2 that you be able to explain why they had to go when they did. Jeff asks Judd how he feels about someone going home. Judd, with his diarrhea of the mouth, says that everyone is lying and wants someone else to go home. Danni keeps the giant toad immunity necklace and it’s time to vote. Danni votes for Judd saying she had to do what she had to do. Judd votes for Lydia saying she sang and danced her way out of the jungle. No more votes are seen. When Jeff tallies the votes, a shocker, by a 4-2 vote Judd is voted out! As he leaves, he gives us our Quote of the Week. After Judd has angrily departed, Jeff says you can’t rely on what used to be because the game just took a very big change. Grab your torches and head back to camp. Good night! QUOTE OF THE WEEK In one of the best parting shots of the show’s history, Judd gave this award winner when leaving the Tribal Council area: "Thanks, guys. I hope you guys all get bit by a freaking crocodile. Scumbags. Scumbags." YES! ½ of the Gruesome Twosome is gone and boy was he ever pissed about it. He promised in his farewell speech that he would have plenty to say at the Final Tribal Council so it should be an excellent finale. We can only hope that the other one, Steph, is ceremoniously booted next week. Reminder, this is Survivor Week coming up. We get the regular show on Thursday and the Season Finale on Sunday night followed by the Reunion Show. Be sure to tune in for all of the fireworks! Until next week and another edition of Lost and Delirious, take care and God Bless.
Episode 12 Boot & Fourth Jury Member – Judd (Xhakum) Episode 11 Boot & Third Jury Member – Gary (Xhaum) Episode 10 Boot & Second Jury Member – Jaime (Xhakum) Episode 9 Boot & First Jury Member – Bobby Jon (Xhakum) Episode 8 Boot – Brandon (Yaxha) Episode 7 Boot – Amy (Yaxha) Episode 6 Boots – Brian (Yaxha) & Margaret (Nakum) Episode 5 Boot – Blake (Yaxha) Episode 4 Boot – Brooke (Nakum) Episode 3 Boot – Brianna (Yaxha) Episode 2 Boot – Morgan (Yaxha) Episode 1 Boot – Jim (Nakum) |
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