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by Caroline Roberts Published: December 8, 2005
No one is in the mood to party at the beginning of the show. Marcela is already feeling burned by how many times she's been in the conference room, and Bethenny rubs it in after repeating how many times Marcela's been: "You've been called back five times?" Bethenny's arrow hits the target, and Marcela looks wounded. Bethenny and Jim are open about their psychological warfare. When talking about Ryan and Marcela, Jim cackles, "The sheep don't know they're going to the slaughter!" Bethenny growls, "It will be embarrassing if we don't cream them!" When Jim gets a little too excited about "creaming" Matchstick, he leaps up on the top of a counter and acts like an orangutan solely to annoy Dawna. It's working. An In-Flight Video That You'll Actually Watch? Martha communicates with the teams Star Trek-style through the video monitor, as she's off launching a furniture collection in North Carolina. The teams must create an in-flight video for Song, and they will have access to actors and a camera crew. Song frequent flyers will grade the videos, and whoever gets the highest score will win. Ryan will be project manager for Matchstick. Marcela immediately turns the reins over to him, perhaps solely because Bethenny mentioned Marcela's miserable conference-room record. She also thinks it is a smart strategy because she thinks Ryan is "safe." He has a better record, so, if their team loses, she might slip into the next round under the radar. Then again, all this depends on whether or not Ryan is truly safe. Ryan certainly is enthusiastic, and he's ready to "par-tay in New York Cit-tay!" He whips up a concept of a baseball player trying to catch a flight and make the game at the last minute. Marcela calls up Song executives to find out more about the airline's target customer. Unfortunately the target customers are females 40 and over. The baseball-player idea is suddenly in doubt. Marcela has second thoughts, but Ryan seems to have learned nothing from past tasks, and he says, "I’m not worried about target audience." He is so excited about playing a baseball player in the video that his enthusiasm overrides his common sense, which seems to be a frequent problem for Ryan. Martha informs the audience of this week's lesson: "Come up with a solution to what the client needs and wants. Investigate, research, and then develop!" Soon, the viewer observes Primarius following those rules to the letter. Primarius discovers that the target audience is, according to Song execs, "female boomers." Bethenny is feeling this and immediately wants to present a "hip, high-quality lifestyle at an affordable price." Jim also asks the execs what most people wear on their flights. Dawna thinks Jim is going off topic yet again, but Jim's question is a good one - the audience should identify with the actors. Crazy as he is, Jim is a master of details. At this point is a hint of things to come: a Song exec points out that the airline is the only one that serves signature cocktails in a "acrylic martini glass." The demon alcohol lurks in the background as Primarius moves at lightning speed. For the video's hook, Bethenny serves up the line "High style, low fare." Not only does she have the line for the video, but she's also figured out how to manage the team and work their strengths: "Dawna is the organizer, Jim is the artist, and the more I move through this process, it's always me with the big idea." Bethenny already knows not to take Jim too seriously, and she doesn't even flinch when Jim declares that he wants to find an actress to play a flight attendant with "sexy calves." Naturally, Jim is having a blast while casting the video. Alexis and Charles visit the casting session, and they are impressed. Despite Jim's weird orangutan moments and bodily fixations, Primarius is professional. Even without Leslie, Matchstick manages to turn out a childish product in comparison. Matchstick doesn't even think of casting, assuming that Ryan will be the baseball player in the video. Marcela thinks it is fine because the video is "meant to be a comedy." At least Ryan and Marcela work well together. Almost too well. Marcela seems to agree with all of Ryan's ideas, and she lets him do everything. When Alexis and Charles visits the Matchstick video shoot, Charles notices that Ryan is overbooked: "Ryan's trying to pitch and catch at the same time, and the ball travels too quickly." Alexis notices that Ryan is running around in shorts. At least Marcela and Ryan seem to be having fun. If Matchstick loses, they'll have a good time doing it - a really good time. At this point, it looks like one of the contestants is going to get sauced because Jim is just being Jim again. While Primarius shoots its commercial, Bethenny complains, "Jim thinks he's Fellini!" (Come to think of it, Jim might fit right in 8 1/2.) Once he gets on the plane, Jim acts like he wants to get his hands on one of those signature Song martini glasses. Dawna kicks into full-on Prohibition mode, asking a Song employee: "We're not getting real martini drinks, are we?" She is adamant that Jim won't touch a drop: "We can't have Jim drinking any. No alcohol for him! No! He's already crazy as it is, and he doesn't need any alcohol in his system. We're getting real alcohol, and Jim does not drink any. I'm serious." Thanks to Dawna's vigilance, no little bottles of liquor were harmed in the shooting of the video. Alas, Marcela isn't nearly that vigilant with Ryan. During their editing session, Marcela and Ryan find beer in the fridge and decide to celebrate. And when Ryan celebrates, he celebrates like it's 1999, and he thinks it is okay because "The guys who work in that business, they drink beers and edit!" Marcela tries to shush him, and clunky music plays, but Ryan soon reveals what kind of drunk he is. You know how there's a Sad Drunk, a Silly Drunk, or an Angry Drunk? Well, Ryan is a Genius Drunk. Between "the fourth Sapporo and before the fifth Heineken," Ryan thinks up a tagline for the commercial: "Need we play more?" Uh, cute, but it's a pun on the baseball and has nothing to do with the airline. Marcela hates the idea, but Ryan is convinced that he's discovered gold. Ryan tells the camera, "Vincent Van Gogh cut his ear off and made some beautiful art. So I'm having a couple of beers and making a video, you know?" Incredibly enough, Ryan doesn't polish off that line with a burp. When the teams roll the in-flight videos, Primarius has great graphics and good actors. It is slick - a little generic, but thoroughly professional. Bethenny's tag line is clearly a hit. On the other hand, Matchstick's video looks like it came from your Uncle Jim's trunk full of VHS tapes. Despite the professional editing crew, Ryan's bad acting drags down the video, and the lame joke at the end - "Why fly with the team when you can fly song?" - falls flatter than a Police Academy sequel. Primarius conquers, yet again. Discipline and Punish: Martha Takes Everyone on a Ride Edition Primarius enjoys the final reward, and they travel to Bedford for horseback riding and Scrabble with Martha. Martha's stable is nicer than most people's homes, and her game of Scrabble is far more intense than it should be. Dawna is unusually nervous because she hasn't played the game before. She keeps asking questions and reveals one of her few flaws - she isn't that comfortable around anything new. Bethenny thinks Dawna is just being silly: "It wasn't like chess! We're not asking you to be Bobby Fischer here!" As they leave Bedford, Jim calls Martha "cute." Yes, that's a surefire way to please the boss - talk about how hot he or she is. Marcela and Ryan sit alone and mope about their loss. There's not much to fight about. Marcela suggests that maybe Ryan slacked off because he thought that Marcela would go home first, but Ryan won't go along with that. He may have gotten drunk and embarrassed himself on national television, but he did almost everything to produce that video, and Marcela only cheered him on. Their little spat doesn't amount to much. Martha and the Minions torture Ryan and Marcela by playing the commercial again, and Martha immediately pounces on Ryan's lame "Need we play more?" tagline. Alexis brings up that the target audience isn't baseball-loving guys, and, to prove that point, Martha reads the savage audience comments. Charles reminds Ryan, "You're not Woody Allen!" When it's time for Ryan to explain his drinking, his reason is priceless and deserves to be showcased: "The beer was free." Talk about utilizing resources! The next time you make a booze boo-boo, just explain that the beer was free! Martha uses her tried-and-true method of weeding out contestants by asking Ryan why he wants to be her apprentice. He responds with, "I like business. That's the calling for me." That and an open bar. Martha gives him an alternative to reality television: "Maybe you should go to business school and get more education." She finishes him off with "You started off strong, and you ended up badly." Next, Martha delivers her second punch. She's finally had it with Marcela. Despite her incredible defenses of herself in the boardroom, Marcela has to go. She's had solid excuses for her lackluster performances, but, if she can't work with Ryan, she can't work with anyone. And she's too much of a "yes-person" to succeed as an executive. Martha says, "I'm just not seeing any real passion in your approach here. Here at Martha Stewart Living, you have to push to get your ideas across." Then Martha brings up Marcela's record. "Neither of you really fit in." And both of them are going home. Next week: Interviews! And it looks like Jim doesn't leap on top of the table and scratch himself this time. |
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