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by Jim Van Nest Published: January 4, 2002
EXHAUSTION, ELEPHANT CRAP, BOREDOM AND TOM'S FEET What a gruesome combo that is, eh? Well, we start the morning after the vote to kick off Kim P and everyone is talking about how tired they are and how ready to go home they are. I mean, we're 6 days from the finish now, and everyone's a little antsy to get back to their families and their lives. Exhaustion is more than physical now. It's mental and it's psychological. But, despite the exhaustion, they all pick themselves up to go to the watering hole for a quick bath. Unfortunately, they were left a rather large package right in the middle of it. As they get to the watering hole, they find a large steaming pile of elephant dung smack in the middle of their watering hole. It's fresh and it's already covered with bugs and it's beginning to reek in the midday sun. Apparently, the elephants using this hole as a toilet is not new as Tom discusses how Kim always bathes away from the rest of the group and smack in the middle of the pachyderm latrine. He says he's told her about it before and she doesn’t listen. He's checked her out to see if she smells like an elephant, but he says she does not. Back at camp is when the boredom sets in. I mean, these people have been together 24 hours a day for 34 days now. What could they possibly have to say to each other? What could they possibly have left to do? Well, they can discuss Tom's feet. That's what they can do. Apparently, Tom has the stinkiest feet known to man. This coming from Ethan, the professional soccer player. You know, the guy who is around an entire team of guys with sweaty stinky feet in leather soccer shoes that give little room for the feet to breathe? So, if he says these feet stink, I believe him! He suggests Tom throw his boots in the fire to help kill the smell. "He's got some kind of funk down there that I've never smelled before," were his exact words. BIG RED THE CHICKEN AND A REWARD MINUS THE CHALLENGE After the fuss over Tom's bunions calms down a little, we get a quick shot of Big Red the chicken running around free outside his pen. Needless to say, this is a cause for concern as that chicken represents at least one halfway decent meal. Teresa decides she's going to go catch the chicken and put him back. So she starts walking after him and eventually ends up running to no avail. Tom is quick to point out that none of them are going to be quick enough to catch the chicken like that. Writer's aside: Hell...even Rocky took months of practice and training before he caught that chicken. Gone are the days of teachers like Mickey. "Because you can't win, Rock! This guy will kill you to death inside of three rounds!" So what Tom suggests is that Teresa follow the chicken and force it over by him. Now let me set this up for you. Tom was starting to nap when the chicken got out. So, he's groggy and tired. He rolls over on his stomach and just lies there. When that chicken gets within arms length of him, he snatches out his arm and grabs that chicken by both feet. It was quite impressive. It took almost no effort. Good show, Tommy. So, the group heads off to get the tree mail for the day. Expecting a note hinting at their reward challenge, they actually find 5 envelopes. One for each of them. Inside they all find letters sent to them by their loved ones. No challenge, just free letters. Everyone is very moved and very teary-eyed. They all seem to agree that this was exactly the push they needed to suck it up and get through these last 5 1/2 days. REWARD CHALLENGE 12 So, the next time they check the tree mail, it really is a clue to the reward challenge. And what do you know, it's written as a Haiku. Of course, this gets everyone thinking that they're going to have to do something with Haikus for the challenge. This turns out to be incorrect. The reward challenge this time is a simple word search puzzle. Of course, all the words are in Swahili, so it has a little bit of a twist. Also part of the twist is that each word will intersect with at least one other word. The letters that are in the intersection will then unscramble to make the actual solution of the puzzle. And the solution to the puzzle is a hint as to what half the reward is. The rest will come after the competition is over. To assist is unscrambling the letters, a clue is provided in a sealed envelope that cannot be opened until Jeff has confirmed that you found all 12 words. This was one of the more dull challenges. In fact, I'd liken it to watching paint dry. Mainly because Lex had found 3 words before anyone else had found 1. So, it really wasn't much of a race. Lex finds his 12th word while his nearest competitor was somewhere around 6. He opens the envelope and the clue is: Natural occurrence Awesome power. You got a quick glance at his letters and I could make out C, H, L, A, N and V. Well, I've watched the show enough and seen the commercials enough to figure out pretty quickly that this would probably spell out Avalanche. As in Chevy Avalanche. Writer's aside: Why is it that Survivor seems to be the home for the ugliest most ridiculous vehicles being made? I mean, at first they gave away an Aztec. Wow, it's a truck that turns into a tent. Now, it's the SUV that turns into a pick-up truck. Hey, Mr. Burnett, Chevy makes plenty of other vehicles. Some that people might actually want, even. Why not give away a Suburban or a Silverado or something cool? Just a suggestion. So, after a few seconds, Lex puts the clue together and easily wins the reward. And what do you know, he's won a Chevy Avalanche. Bully for him! It's at this point that you start to see jealousy sprouting in the other players. Ethan, for instance, is almost seething. He's not really mad AT Lex, just a little mad that Lex keeps winning everything. Well, that and he would like that truck. For the second part of the reward, Jeff tells Lex that he's going to help be a goodwill ambassador by bringing a one-year supply of medical supplies to a local hospital. With HIV running wild in Africa, they need a lot of supplies to help treat HIV. So, with that news, Jeff and Lex hop in the new truck and head on out to Wamba Hospital. When they get there, we learn that this hospital had been started 40 years ago and has survived solely on charitable donations, like the one CBS is giving today. They get a tour of the facility, Lex gets to hand out toys to the orphans in the pediatric ward. You can tell it's a truly moving experience. Frankly, it's the kind of experience that can change a man, in my opinion. The bottom line is that Lex has now had every cool reward in this season of Survivor and I'd say he's had the 3 best rewards of any of the 3 seasons of Survivor. No wonder everyone's jealous and talking about him while he's gone. AND THE BATTLE OF WITS WAGES ON When Lex gets back to camp, he can tell that something is not right. Camp is very tense and he can tell that strategies were discussed all day. He could also feel the resentment at him winning so many challenges. So, he tells everyone about his day and what he saw. You can tell that while they're interested, their jealousy has gotten the best of just about everyone else. Now is when all the strategizing really begins to take off. We've got Kim talking to Ethan about voting off Lex to help them get to the final 2. We've got Kim talking to Lex about Tom saying that Tom's been trying to get rid of Lex. Ethan and Tom are talking about booting Lex. Teresa and Kim are talking about booting Lex. Teresa seems to think she can turn Tom and the 3 of them could take Lex out. Kim seems to be agreeing with her and this agreement is met with a little condescension, if you ask me. Like Kim's finally figuring out what all-knowing Teresa has know for ages. Writer's aside: I am SO ready for Teresa to be gone. She's been doing nothing but stabbing everyone in the back, talking about everyone to everyone, anything she can possibly think of to save her own ass. I know Lex is the guy that America loves to hate right now but for me, it's Teresa. I don't like the way she's playing this at all. At least Lex has been honest with people from day one. You've never had to wonder if he's lying just to save his behind. IMMUNITY CHALLENGE # 12 And the tree mail indicates that this week's immunity challenge might be something they've done before. Very interesting. When they get to the challenge they find an obstacle course made up of miniature versions of several of their previous challenges. The course has 6 stations: 1) They have to put a puzzle ladder together. 2) They need to use that ladder to climb to the netting crawl. 3) After the net, they'll need to pull a full wheelbarrow about 50 feet. 4) The wheelbarrow is full of puzzle pieces. They'll need to put a small puzzle together. 5) Once the puzzle is together, they'll have to go under a ladder crawl. 6) And they'll finish off by shooting an arrow and lighting up a target. We cut to Teresa talking about her butt being on the line and she is going to do everything possible to win this challenge. Once the race starts, it turns into a 3-person race, real quick. Tom, Ethan and Lex all finish their ladders well ahead of the ladies. When they get to the net climb, Tom falls down and Ethan has trouble getting on. What that means...Lex takes a sizeable lead. Ethan makes up some ground and they're pretty close to even as they're putting the puzzle together. Not surprisingly, Lex finishes his first and slides easily under the ladder crawl to the bow and arrows. One shot later, Lex's target is ablaze and Lex is once again wearing the Immunity Necklace. STRATEGIES AND TERESA'S LAST DITCH EFFORT Now that he's won immunity again, Teresa decides now is a good time to talk to Lex and stab someone else in the back. Looks like Tom is the victim this time. She hints to Lex that someone wants him gone and that he needs to watch his back. She then decides to "come clean" about casting the phantom vote that sent Lex into a frenzy a few weeks ago. Like perhaps he'll decide that since she was so honest, he won't vote for her. She says the reason that she voted for him was because someone told her Lex needed to go. She wouldn't say whom, but with only 3 other people left in the game, it's pretty darn obvious she's saying Tom told her that. It seems good ole boy Tom has been trying to get rid of Lex without ever casting a vote for him. Basically, let someone else do it, so he can still look like the nice guy. Kim then chimes in with a story of Tom telling her to also vote for Lex. The seed of doubt has been planted in Lex's brain. He's now wondering if Big Tom is really his friend or not. TRIBAL COUNCIL #12 The first thing mentioned at Tribal Council this week was the fact that Kelly was wearing a t-shirt with the word 'shameless' written across it. Jeff makes mention of it in relation to the comment made in last week's TC that people getting kicked off have to take the "walk of shame." Lex is quick to point out that that is something the entire group of them had called that long walk home. Not that any shame should be attached to it, it was just a cutesy little thing to call it. The next thing Captain Obvious points out is that Teresa is the last of the Samburu. Needless to say, everyone is aware of that. You can tell that Teresa expects to go. The last question goes to Tom. Jeff asks him if he knows whom he is voting for and if he has a game plan for after this TC. He says he knows who to vote for, but he doesn't game plan until after the vote at TC. He could be the one leaving tonight, so planning for tomorrow is not a good idea. Well, time to vote. They show one vote this time around and it's Tom's vote for Teresa. They play the audio of Lex's vote. "It's with a heavy heart that I cast this vote for you. A heavy heart." Ok, let's tally the votes. When all is said and done, the Boran Alliance stuck together and voted Teresa out by a score of 4-1. Teresa's lone vote being cast for Tom. So, Teresa becomes the 12th person voted off the show and the 5th member of the all-powerful jury. With the final 4 all set, we should be getting a 2-hour episode next week and a person will be crowned The Ultimate Survivor. QUOTE OF THE WEEK This week's Quote of the Week isn't an actual quote from a person, but rather one of the poems from one of the tree mails in this episode. There's no way I could watch this episode and hear them discuss haikus without thinking of a friend of mine. His name's Ryan, more commonly known to the HSX community as hose311. He is the master of the haiku. And it's in his honor that this week's QotW is: A surprise visit For one whose brain is sharpest But who will claim it? Well, kids it's been another fun week and I look forward to wrapping this thing up next week. Please come back to The Trades early next week as we'll be presenting our picks for the 2 people to be kicked off and the one to be crowned the Ultimate Survivor. Until then, take care and God Bless.
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